First Year Of Marriage in an LDR looks a lot like this. The life of an LDR is such we are always counting down, always saving for the next trip and living with the pain of missing each other.
We both hear people say “I couldn’t do an LDR” which is an ignorant statement. Those people fail to realize that we didn’t choose to be in an LDR we just fell in with someone who lives a long way away and we choose that inconvenience over being with the wrong person.
I haven’t physically been with my wife for 110 days and in just 48 days we will be celebrating our first wedding anniversary.
We have spent a grand total of 5.47% of the year together and this tiny slither of life together. No relationship would survive on just 5% contact, you see our marriage exist on the phone for most of the other 95%.
Consistent Communication and Authenticity
Consistent Communication and Authenticity is the glue that holds it all together, for example, our phone calls on a typical weekday looks like this.
0600- 0615 after our shower ( Jon & Rachel)
0700- 0745 drive to daycare ( Jon & Rachel & Lucy)
0745- 0800 drive to work (Jon & Rachel)
1630- 1645 drive to daycare (Jon & Rachel)
1645- 1730 drive home
1930- 2030 evening (Jon & Rachel & Ella)
2130- 0500 Sleep on the phone with together
First Year Of Marriage in an LDR – What Do We Speak About.
We talk about;
- Life, how we slept, the traffic,
- teaching Lucy how to talk,
- work, the traffic,
- shopping, what we’re going to eat,
- our business, singing with Lucy,
- extended family stuff, money stuff,
- Lucy’s Life events, Ella will chat about her day or read or tell stories,
- Then Mr and Mrs Walters go to bed
So really the only difference is not physically being there in person.
Throughout our daily calls we cover all the bases;
- To feel loved, To feel missed,
- To feel wanted, and Respected,
- Share our thoughts and ideas,
- Make each other laugh a lot,
- We are there to vent to each other and we console each other when necessary.
Over the years we have become masters at communicating and sharing our authentic thoughts and feelings, we both feel apart of something greater than the sum of parts. Sometimes we have a date night and play games check our date night blog
Some say “We only get along because we don’t live together”
However, they are wrong we get along because we are perfect for each other.
Things will be different when we live together – it will be better.
We have 6 months between physical trips but we don’t pick up and put down our marriage every 6months. We just do in person everything we have been doing on the phone.
Long Distance Relationships are hard expensive and more effort and sacrifice but worth every mile.